When you hear the buzz words that are often associated with ADHD, do you picture a specific gender portraying those characteristics? Chances are you have heard: impulsive, runs as if on a motor, inattentive, hyperactive, doesn’t stop moving, can’t sit still, easily distracted, or interrupts often.
The very general understanding of ADHD that our society has does a disservice
to those people walking around with an ADHD brain. Not only do we tend to
gender stereotype, often girls are overlooked or treated differently based
on what ADHD is to them.
Let’s explore the 3 main questions about girls and ADHD:
She isn’t hyperactive, how
could she have ADHD?
Girls tend to be overlooked because, for girls, ADHD tends to be an internalized
disorder. Girls do not typically portray the outward signs of ADHD as we generally
know it. “Girls with ADHD tend to internalize criticism they receive from peers,
teachers and parents, leading to a strong sense of shame and self-blame”
(Nadeau, 12). The hyperactive part of a girl with ADHD is often confused with
other concerns not stereotypically associated with ADHD. “A chatty Cathy” for
example may be what a parent h
ears about their daughter. Excessive talking is
one way that hyperactivity may present in girls. Additionally, girls may have the
hyperactivity happening inside their mind. They may constantly jump from thought
to thought and react impulsively instead of thinking things through all the way.
That being said, there are two types of ADHD: the hyperactive and the inattentive.
If she doesn’t have the hyperactive, she can still be diagnosed with ADHD.
Why hasn’t my daughter been diagnosed?
In general, girls tend to be less disruptive by nature in the classroom. They are
often quieter, more likely to be wallflowers and to listen before they speak. These
characteristics create less behavioral problems for teachers, which leave these
girls who are struggling with ADHD unnoticed. “ADHD is diagnosed and treated
more often in males than in females. Research on gender differences suggests
that girls may be consistently underidentified and underdiagnosed because of
differences in the expression of the disorder among boys and girls”
(BMC Psychiatry, 2013). ADHD was grouped as a disruptive behavior in
the DSM making it harder to identify in non-disruptive kids. This also led to more
boys being diagnosed than girls. “ADHD questionnaires are not designed to
identify the internalized struggles of most girls with ADHD. Thom Hartmann
said that, for girls, ADHD is an internalized disorder. While boys with ADHD may
externalize their needs -- demanding arguing, fighting, resisting or disrupting --
many girls do not manifest their n
eeds and feelings externally. One of the best
ways to find out about a girl’s needs is to ask in a setting where a girl can
feel safe and secure. If the teacher notes any of these behavioral patterns in
girls aged ten and above, a self-report form may prove very beneficial in
diagnosing ADHD. “For girls under the age of ten, a verbal interview with the
girl and her parent or parents m
ay yield better information” (Nadeau, 207).
These girls are also overlooked because they often over work themselves to
compensate for ways that they are struggling. They may work to please those
around them using their anxiety of making a mistake or not doing a good job to
drive their efforts. “While Academic functioning is important, girls who work
incredibly hard to keep up with academic demands can still suffer significant
damage to their self esteem, identity development, and social functioning learning
good grades” (Nadeau, 207).
How can I help my daughter diagnosed with ADHD?
If you haven’t looked into options for an educational screening or a meeting with
your child’s teacher or IEP team, start there. There are options for meetings to
identify whether or not your child
could qualify for an IEP or 504 plan. Identifying and
gathering a team of people to h
elp you will make the process much easier. This team
of people could include: teachers, counselors, doctors, psychologists, coaches, or
therapists. Educate yourself on ADHD, especially that in girls. You are your child’s
biggest advocate. Stigmas and other assumptions around ADHD continue to foster
feelings of fear and shame that make girls hide. Make sure you are providing other
supports and looking into possible ways to help her build her confidence and
self-esteem. Having someone to talk to and share these feelings with is important.
Consider an ADHD coach, someone who can really help her identify struggles
and ways to find success with her amazing brain!
Resources
Nadeau, Kathleen G., et al. Understanding Girls with ADHD How They Feel and Why They Do What They Do. Advantage Books, 2016.